bored beyond belief #44 – A disgruntled 50 and a T

Listen here [31.20]

Listener discretion advised (no offense)

A Giant-Sized, double-issue bored beyond belief!

Teresa joins me to wish me warm birthday wishes – I have reached the big 5-0. She offers me useless advice about becoming a “senior”

Her menopause is improved now that she’s on birth control pills  (“ping-ping”) and the regrets of never having an abortion.

Teresa fulminates about the word “senior”. Teresa insists that the phrase “mature adult” is an oxymoron.

Joe G. is in his “golden years”.

What’s new with California besides Miss California. Can you say “insolvency“?

I miss trash piling up in the streets – then I blabber & reminisce about the 1960’s/1970’s.  Teresa asks if my teens were the “best years of [my] life”.

Digital TV and re-seeing the wonders of blaxploitation movies! The wonderful Pam Grier!

What was it like growing up in the 1970’s? Remember trash pick-up strikes?

What was the #1 song was on the day of your birth?

What plans might I have for my 50th birthday?

Groaning about my health issues – I’m a senior now, after all. Would you want to be awake for surgery? My health insurance won’t pay for the less invasive procedure.

The young try to be respectful to seniors like me…

Incidental music:
Kansas City – Wilbert Harrison
Do Wah Diddy – Manfred Mann
Oh, Pretty Woman – Roy Orbison (Japanese style)
Ringo - Lorne Greene
Venus – Frankie Avalon
It’s Not Your Birthday Anymore – Morrissey

EXTRA DOUBLE ISSUE BONUS! – the wise words of “Miss California” (thanks to Lisa Nova)

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bored beyond belief #36 – Teresa’s Lament

Listen here [12:00]

It’s Teresa Ortega’s birthday phone call.

Part 1:
She’s feeling older. She’s entered into the “time of life”.
Teresa’s laments about menopause:

• She’s gotten it earlier than when she thought it would happen.
• Menstruation – It’s more convenient, but not cured.
• Visiting witch doctors for cures.
• She started menstruation at 10 years of age.
• Her girlfriend got started with the menopause later.
• Hysterectomies and her uterus is ours.
• Very tired…The reproductive system is breaking down like a camp site.

Part 2:
Menopause is different for the lesbians.
Get those bits out of there
It feels unfair to go through all of the bleeding if you’re not going to have kids.
Lesbians had children in different ways in the past.
The Family Unit is a source of evil in the world.
Sarah Palin is evidence of how far women have come.
Annoyed how people speak about Palin in the media.
Pet peeve about how the media make Palin out to be sexy.
Betty White + Obama
As long as they can read.

Parts 3:
Teresa’s charitable thoughts about children.
She’s did not come out as a lesbian so that she could go on a cruise with lesbians and their children.
Child hater.

Incidental music.
Peggy Lee – “I Enjoy Being a Girl”

Outro:
I’ve been busy, busy, busy…just like you.
You can now reach me at the bored beyond belief listener’s phone line: 206-350-7630

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bored beyond belief #25 – birthdays, Gay Agenda, Scientology, Huckabee and a gun aimed at Obama

Listen here [running time - 14:16]

The Zilla snore exists.

What did you think of the new opening for the audio blog? I changed it because next week is my birthday. It’s my niece’s and my grand-nephew’s birthday next week, too. Buon compleanno!

You all loved the Teresa. More of her in future audio posts.

My approach to mentioning commentors on the audio blog. Did I hurt my sister’s feelings?

I hope to record an audio blog of a private tutoring session with my private italian tutor Camilla (who comments on this blog).

The Ohio Christian Alliance is against a state law banning discrimination and gender expression because of the Kentie’s Gay Agenda. I am a gay agenda-er, as is Terasina, Zillafag, and Kentie, are you?

Being videotaped by local Sceintologists. Local protesters in disguise, confront the Church of Sceintology.

Off the cuff comment from Huckabee reinforces some fears within the African-American community about Obama being a target for assassination because of his ancestry. Huckabee is an ass and always will be. Thanks to Pam from Pam’s House Blend for the information and the rant!

I am a member of the Freak Network, if you hadn’t noticed. Pizzababe is its goddess; Zillafag is its court jester.

What do you think of the new intro?